Oh Santa

Growing up in Oxnard we spent many Christmases at my Tia (aunt) Mary’s house. The adults would get merry and bright with lots of beer while the younger kids ran around and the older kids played Nintendo. One Christmas at Tia Mary’s house in particular stands out in my memory because Santa dropped by to surprise us kids! Except…well it wasn’t the idealistic jolly old man hefting a bag of toys laughing jovially. My Tio (uncle) Mark was not old, he’s the youngest of my aunt’s and uncle’s but he was definitely jolly…very jolly from drinking lots of beer!

Ecard created by me!
Ecard created by me!

I’m not sure what the original plan was, but all I remember is the adults trying to get us excited about Santa and I clearly remember looking up peering into the face of “Santa” and getting a good whiff of his beer breath and knowing immediately who was really behind the St. Nick suit. I think he let out a few half-hearted “Ho, ho, hos” and tried to act like Santa but he, and everyone else was just trying really hard to contain their laughter. If anyone in the family reads this feel free to fill in the details about this Christmas, I must have been maybe 6 or 7 when this happened.

Do you have any funny Santa stories? Share them with me in the comments below!

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2 thoughts on “Oh Santa”

  1. Mine is not really funny but I guess it’s funny now!!! When I was little, my grandpa dressed up every year to deliver gifts to all of the grandchildren. For some reason he decided that year that I would get the coal! I watched all of my brothers and sisters and cousins get presents, and finally, he reached into his bag and gave me a big lump of coal! I burst into tears and ran out of the room – and even though he came and got me and gave me real presents, apparently I refused to open the real gifts and cried all night. So mean!!! lol.

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